Mister
Always Right, my apologies for the delay in response. I’m sure you’ve noticed me pulling away a little bit. It all happened so fast, you blog, I blog, one thing led to another and the next thing I know an internet love affair rears its sexy head. But affair? Official? This is a lot to think about, this is some pretty heavy shit. So I’ve done what my Daddy tells me to do when I’m faced with a difficult decision and made a Benji Franklin List, I think that’s what it’s called, a pros and cons of sorts. Here’s what I came up with:
Pros:
-You seem to be as hopelessly romantic as yours truly.
-I like the color blue, your blog is blue.
-Your ability to compromise is a delight.
-You said we could get a monkey.
-You said your low-balls were only for financial gain.
-You said balls.
Cons:
-I don’t like fainting.
-I typically prefer my lovers to be tangible; my Blackberry can’t spoon me, kiss me, or take me out for sushi. My Blackberry can’t babysit my cat while I’m away or just get smashed and smoosh. (but gawd, wouldn’t it be rad if my Blackberry
could do those things?)
-I’m concerned I might be too busy for an internet love affair, what with American Idol just starting and I’m trying to grow my hair out, the pools open in precisely 105 days so I’ve got to work on my fitness, I’m working diligently to perfect the art of motorcycle maintenance, I’m still volunteering at the fire house on Tuesdays, then there’s Taco Tuesday so Tuesday’s just really aren’t good for me, I’ve got a
real job too which keeps me tied up from 8:55-5:03, Monday though Friday, I’ve got to finish this essay about the Russian Empire that was due March 3rd, 1999 (I don’t like to leave things unfinished, I would hate to die and for my unfinished business to be that essay and my ghost has to haunt my old history teacher, Mr. Oldie. That would suck.) I’m also getting ready to launch my Cotton Candy independent study in May 2012 so I have a lot of shit to do to get ready for that, my birthday is coming up, I only have 227 days to get my wish list finalized, I just got Snookie’s new book, I’m
sure that’s not an easy read, I like to go out and get a little bit drunk on the weekends which leaves very little time for those sexy weekend Skype dates, all the while little ‘ol me’s just trying to keep up with the Kardashian’s… (sigh) you see where this is going? I’m afraid I wouldn’t be able to give you what you need, what you so richly deserve.
So I guess I’m asking if we can just be friends, Facebook friends is cool, pen pals works too. I mean until my life slows down a little. I’m just focused on all my careers, my mind, buns and thighs and soul. So you see, as they say, it’s not you, it’s me.
Sooo, we’re good, right?
lylys
Perhaps I am the last to learn of this 6 year old sex scandal, I’m not big on sluts or politics so I’m not surprised I was in the dark. However, a girlfriend of mine turned me on to this little drama on the Hill recently and I’m so intrigued. This Jessica Cutler girl is a fucking nightmare! A hot mess, a walking shit show with serious daddy issues. I fucking love her! This broad worked in the Senate office, carried on multiple kinky-weird relationships within the office and blogged in detail about her sexcapades in an X-rated blog. She kept complete anonymity for like 15 days then someone found her out, blew her cover and the ho got canned in a hot minute. I mean, the stuff she writes… you cannot make this shit up. It’s un-fucking-real. Bitch has a book out now, I’m buying it ASAP… in paperback and on tape. Below is the link to her daily postings, you should definitely familiarize yourself if you haven’t already.
