Tonight!!!!! DJ Never-Heard-of-Him on the one’s and two’s with opening sets by DJ This-Is-My-First-Time-Being-a-DJ and DJ I-Left-My-Wallet-at-Home-I’m-Just-Doing-This-for-the-Free-Redbull-Vodka! Top 40, House and Journey all night long.
Come get cray at Club Groundhog Day, where it’s the same fucking thing every fucking night and it’s always about to go down! People are gonna MURDER BEATS tonight, son!
Two for One drinks from 7-9, when it’s waaaay too early for you to be at the club!
Appearances by that dead doctor from CSI Miami, Season 4, Episode 7 and your high school math teacher!!
Hosted by two dudes that think having their name on this flyer makes their penis large!!!
Official after party of Disney on Ice!
Sponsored by Pancake Flavored Vodka and Heart Attack Energy Drink!
Celebrating the birthdays of Tommy V-Neck and 12 other people who have the same birthday but didn’t make me put their name on this flyer.
For bottle service call Allison BigBoobs where she will charge you 300 dollars for a bottle of vod that cost us 22! Woooo! Purchase a table and get a free temporary Mike Tyson face tattoo!
So guys, come out and try to get laid tonight! Ladies, come out and fend off over-cologned boners! These DJ’s are gonna murder you! things!! the music.
Message me to get on the list that anybody in the free world who messages me to get on… can get on… and means pretty much nothing but your name on a piece of paper. No line, no cover; because we don’t have lines or covers, we just like to say that.
And don’t miss tomorrow night with DJ Anyone-Can-Be-a-DJ-Nowadays, we’re doin' it allllllll over again, son! Come get some! Leggooooo!
Strict dress code: No hats or earmuffs.
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